Everyone has negative thoughts. They pop in your mind randomly. Most people move on to the next thought. However, for those struggling anxiety disorders, the negative thoughts replay over and over as if on a loop and multiply exponentially. These random negative thoughts take hold, put down roots and before long, the person is experiencing anxiety and stress.
One of the main therapies for anxiety disorders is CBT or cognitive-behavioral therapy. One of the first aims of CBT is to teach an anxious patient how to recognize those negative thoughts before they proliferate and create an anxiety attack or stress.
Dangers of Negative Thinking
- Negative thoughts can trigger a panic attack and the fight or flight response, and that means a physical reaction to the stress in which pulse races, heart pounds, sweating begins, respiration increases.
- Stress depletes the immune system, lowering our capability to fight off disease and illness.
- Stress is linked to hormonal problems, heart disease, sleep disorders, weight issues, pain problems, high blood pressure and chronic pain.
- Stress left unchecked increases anxiety and can lead to a much lower quality of life.
Identifying Negative Thoughts
When you are faced with a situation that makes you uncomfortable, the negative thinking-stress-anxiety pattern begins. To stop the cycle, you must first learn to identify negative thoughts as they enter your mind.
Let’s say a potentially negative thought enters your mind. First instance, you are called to attend a meeting at your child’s school. The first thought that you encounter is, “Oh, no! My child is going to be kicked out of school!”
That is definitely not a positive or even a neutral thought. It is clearly a negative thought. Instead of allowing the thought to blossom and grow, stop it immediately. Catch the thought and examine it from a more neutral and realistic point of view.
“Well, my child has not been in trouble before. Maybe they just need to speak with me about a new situation that has come up before it becomes a problem. My child’s teacher has always seemed a supportive and caring teacher. There’s no reason to believe something horrible has happened.”
You aren’t going over the edge with overly positive thoughts like, “Oh, my child has been doing such a magnificent job they want to promote him to the next grade level!” You are merely correcting thinking that is out of line with reality and is overly negative.
You must train yourself to check negative thoughts as they pop up. Stop and think about their validity and whether they are realistic thoughts.
Types of Negative Thinking
Filtered thoughts. These are thoughts that eliminate any positive aspects and focus only on the negatives in a situation. “I’m going to fail this test. I’m sure I won’t remember any answers.”
Over-generalizing. These thoughts typically use words like “never,” or “always.” Thoughts like, “I always make a fool of myself at these interviews. I never do well! I’ll never get a job!”
Black or white. This all or nothing thinking ups the ante with thoughts like, “If I don’t lose these 10 pounds, I’m going to be single forever.”
Shoulda or oughta. Thinking that focuses so much on what should be done probably will induce anxiety that isn’t necessary. “I should have all this work done before the deadline. If I don’t they may think I’m not up to the job.”
Worst case scenario. This is when everything seems like the end of the world. You get locked into thoughts that the worst will/is happening and you are powerless to do anything about the outcome. “My check is late and now I’m going to fall behind on my bills. I’m going to be homeless!”
Techniques to Change Negative Thinking
Thought diary. When a negative thought pops to mind, write it down immediately in a little thought notebook or diary. Examine the thought and choose a more realistic thought to replace it. For instance, “I’m going to fail the test.” A replacement neutral/realistic thought would be, “I studied hard for the test. I should do pretty well. If I don’t, I have two weeks to retake it and I’ll do better then.”
Examine negative thoughts that persist. If there are certain negative thoughts that plague you, spend more time examining exactly where they come from and why they haunt you so much. Talk them through with a friend or trusted person. See if you can spot where they go off track and become unrealistically negative. For these types of thoughts, you may want to prepare in advance for them because you know they pop up regularly and cause you anxiety and stress. By examining them in depth and sharing them with someone else, you can rob them of their power over you.
Stop thinking so much! Going over and over a problem, a worry or a past failure and examining it from every angle, nook and cranny will not solve anything when you have an anxiety disorder. Sometimes you have to find an effective means to simply shut your brain up. Exercise and physical distractions can work well as well as help introduce some healthy good-feeling chemicals in your system. Find other ways to distract yourself in healthy ways, like a crossword puzzle, a walk, or some other hobby or activity that is pleasurable and likely to keep your mind happily occupied for at least awhile.